Why I said yes

I've come to discover that I'm not a natural born leader. I've always been more of a "do-er". A list checker, get-it-done kind of person. My husband informed me that leadership is not about doing everything yourself, it is about buy-in. Getting the people you represent to get on board with your vision. He's a pretty smart guy. And his advice got me thinking about our vision for MOPS this year. Why am I doing this? Why did I say yes? Let's walk through the nots.

It's not something to put my name on, something for me to own. It's not so I can be the boss and make all the decisions forming the group into the best representation of "me" out there. It's not even to make new friends, I can do that in MOPS without being one of the leaders. If it were any of these things I would have already imploded from the pressure, the criticism, the hardships, the work.

I said yes for one reason, I saw this door that I could walk through to talk about Jesus more publically.

For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes,. Romans 1:16

I have been praying for a heart for the lost, compassion for those who are living lives, hard, painful, lonely lives with no hope. Honestly, I'm not sure how people cope without Christ.

When I think about him in the desert, being tempted and suffering hunger pains I know that I can survive another sleep deprived night, because I am loved by my Father and the Son endured every hardship and intercedes for me. (Matthew 4, Hebrews 7:25)

When my family is faced with sickness and fear and uncertainty I have a hope in Christ. No matter what the Lord has planned for us in this life, there is a greater reality of life beyond this. I have security in the blood of Christ that this home is not my own, and any light and momentary affliction suffered here, no matter how heart wrenchingly awful, is just what Paul said it is, light and momentary. When we have the perspective that this is not our home, that we are exiles in a strange land waiting to be brought home, we can endure. (2 Corinthians 4:17)

But this kind of perspective only comes from the cross of Jesus Christ. It is graciously offered to sinners with nothing to give back, found at the brink of exhaustion and desperation.

This is where I would be without Christ. Fed-up, frustrated, lost. In need of something greater than myself but with no idea what that something greater looked like. I would know it was out there. I would know just enough to know that it was out of my reach.

I know there are women out there like this, women searching. Mothers at their wits end. Thinking this is too hard, I cannot do this on my own. Of course you can't, dear friend. None of us can. We were never meant to.

That thing about your mothering that you hate. That ugly thing inside of you that comes out at all the wrong moments. That is called sin. We are all sick with it, and it's terminal. But there is hope. Not in ourselves, don't believe the lie that you can be better, you can't. You can only run and hide. Hide behind the one who wants to do it for you.

You see, Jesus was sent from His Father to come to earth. He lived a life of full obedience, never sinning, not even once. He didn't have that darkness inside him that crept out when he didn't get his way. He was perfect. And after 33 years he laid his life down on a cross his blood pouring out as a covering for our sins. So if we place our trust in Jesus, that He is the one who saves, God sees the blood of his son when he looks at us.

Now we don't have to be ashamed of that darkness in us anymore, because that darkness has been overcome by the light of Christ and every day we live here in this broken, exhausting world is another day that we are made more and more like the one who rescued us out of the darkness and brought us into the light.

I want moms to know this, to own this, to get excited about this. The motto for MOPS is Better Moms Make a Better World. But what makes a better mom? A shinier floor, a well-behaved child, a full bank account, a private school? No, nothing makes you better. Nothing but the blood of Jesus. He is better, so get behind him.

This is why I said yes.

To make the name of Jesus great with whatever influence he decides to give me. To let moms out there know that you don't have to be enough, because Jesus wants to be enough for you.